Design a life
that works for your brain

Coaching for autistic, ADHD
and AuDHD women

You don't need to "fix'' yourself

You've been trying to make yourself fit into a world that wasn't designed for your brain.

And you're exhausted.

I help neurodivergent women stop forcing themselves into systems that don't work and start building lives that do.

I offer one-on-one coaching to neurodivergent women who want to make their lives less stressful and more manageable.

We work together to better understand where you are now, clarify where you want to go, and create a plan to help you get there.

Some of the things we might want to explore:

Creating systems that work specifically for you, even if they don't make sense to anyone else
Adapting the world around you so that it works better for you (instead of constantly adapting who you are)
Giving yourself permission to unmask and be your authentic self
Managing the intense emotions that often come with autism and ADHD
Understanding your sensory sensitivities and how they affect your energy
Matching your peak energy periods with the tasks that most benefit from them "fix"
Healing the shame that too often results from having a neurodivergent brain in a world that's designed for neurotypical brains

Trade overwhelm for strategies that work

Hi, I'm Mary Pasciak: a neurodivergence coach, mom, former Buffalo News reporter, and AuDHDer.

Most of my life, I've existed in a near-constant state of overwhelm and exhaustion. When I was diagnosed at the age of 49, I began to understand my life differently.

I dove into the research about the ways that my brain functions differently from a neurotypical brain. I created strategies that actually work for me. My stress level dropped dramatically. And my ever-present shame started to subside.

After seeing how much my life improved, I wanted to help other neurodivergent people benefit in similar ways, so I trained to become a professional coach.

My years in the newsroom taught me how to ask questions that reveal what's true, what's hidden, and what's possible.

I'm still asking those kinds of questions. But instead of gathering information to write news stories, I'm gathering information to fuel personal transformations.

Now I work with people across the United States, as well as Canada and Europe.

Ideas that empower you

My clients learn:

Your thoughts are not facts.

One of the most powerful realizations my clients have is that the stories they've been telling themselves — "I'm lazy," "I'm too much," "I'm failing" — are just thoughts. Not truths.

And you can choose different thoughts.

"I feel much lighter now... just being reminded that the thoughts I had, they were not facts. I can choose to think about myself in a different way." — Anne

Capacity is the key, not productivity.

You've spent your whole life trying to compensate — doing more, pushing harder, masking better. But you never really understood your actual capacity.

Together, we figure out what you can sustainably do, so you stop burning out.

Other people's limitations do not reflect your worth.

Just because someone can't validate you doesn't mean you don't deserve validation.

And just because someone can't meet your needs doesn't mean your needs are wrong.

Contradictory things can coexist.

You can be fearful and fearless. You can feel grief and pride about your diagnosis.

You can honor your past and move forward.

"Facing the direction you want to go doesn't mean turning your back on who you were." — Jax

We work on the things you want to work on.

Some clients need to process their diagnosis. Others are ready to build new systems. Some need to heal shame. Others need practical strategies.

My clients are doing amazing things

I know this might sound like something out of a cheesy made-for-TV movie, but it's true:

When I'm working with clients, there comes a moment when something shifts inside them.

They stop doubting themselves. They stop apologizing.

They reconnect with strengths they've always had — creativity, ingenuity, curiosity, passion — and finally let themselves be who they actually are.

That's when they become unstoppable.

Some of my clients' recent professional wins:

Taking the leap from a corporate IT job to a writing career
Finishing professional projects that had been stalled for months (or years)
Launching a nonprofit organization
Requesting (and getting) workplace accommodations that make their job sustainable
Starting businesses that align with their values and energy

Some of their personal breakthroughs:

Taking control of their finances by creating ADHD-friendly systems
Conquering their inbox (yes, really!)
Being more present with their kids
Building meaningful friendships after years of isolation
Setting (and defending) boundaries without guilt
Learning to rest without shame

The values that guide our work together

Compassion: Our sessions provide a judgment-free zone with plenty of patience, acceptance, and empathy.
Collaboration: We work together to create systems that work for you. You're the expert on your brain. I'm here to guide you.
Neurodivergent pride: ADHD, autism, and AuDHD are differences, not defects. We tailor strategies that accommodate your energy, focus, and sensory needs.
Science: Our work together is grounded in research on how neurodivergent brains work, and what works for neurodivergent brains.
Empowerment: We combine effective strategies with meaningful mindset shifts.

This is right for you if you...

Feel overwhelmed by daily tasks that "should" be simple
Were diagnosed/started self-identifying later in life and are navigating an identity shift
Are tired of masking and ready to be your authentic self
Feel like you're constantly one step away from being "found out"
Cringe every time someone says, "It's easy — you just have to try harder"
Feel ready to stop adapting yourself to the world and start adapting the world to you
Realize you need to rebuild differently as you recover from burnout

Want to learn more?

"When I look forward, there's still tears, but it's like tears of relief." — Dani

If you'd like to move forward, here's what your next steps are:

1. Schedule your free consultation.

We'll spend 30 minutes talking about where you are, where you want to be, and what's been blocking your way.

2. Decide if we're a good fit.

There's no pressure to commit. If this feels right for you, we'll talk about next steps. If it doesn't, I'll point you toward other resources.

3. Start designing a life that works for your brain.

If we decide to work together, we'll schedule your first session and begin the transformation.

Schedule a consultation

Frequently asked questions

How does coaching differ from therapy?

Therapy generally focuses on processing emotions from the past. Coaching focuses on achieving tangible results in the future and building the life you want.

Both are valuable. Many of my clients work with a therapist in addition to working with me.

I haven't been officially diagnosed. Can I still work with you?

We can work together whether you are officially diagnosed, self-identify, or just suspect you might have a brain that is autistic, ADHD, or AuDHD.

Do you work only with cis women?

Cis women, transgender women, nonbinary, agender, autigender, gender fluid — all are welcome here!

I have more questions. How can I contact you?

Let's talk! You can text or call me at 716-320-0220.

Design a life that works for your brain

Coaching for autistic, ADHD and AuDHD women